Ramzaan Mubarak

Ramzaan is not just a spiritually gratifying time for the Muslims of the World.
It is also astonishingly a terrifying time for many housewives , now known as home makers.

There is a couple residing a short distance away from my house .
The husband has retired and is a hypertension patient
The wife too is no longer young. She has health issues all of which I don't know , but I could see heavy swelling on her feet as she scurried in and out of the Casualty Ward where her husband had been brought after he had fainted in the bank where he had gone for some work

After he was shifted to the ICU , and things had settled a bit , she told me that he had been fasting for the day. (It was an optional roza, which he could easily have avoided considering his condition)
She also kept insisting that she was preparing meals for the evening , thereby implying she was under pressure to have the table laid out elaborately with "iftaari"
This tension was certainly not doing her any good

There is another instance that I'm reminded of ...
This was a young couple.
Husband a fitness freak wanted to fast in Ramzaan to control his excessive eating (and I wonder if there was  any religious attachment to the act too ... but that is apart )
However at the iftaar table he would expect an extravagantly sumptuous feast  evening after evening ....
The wife naturally was under a huge stress to have peace at iftaar time

Is this what Ramzaan should entail ?
Is this the spirit of Ramzaan ?

Namaaz padho ,  Roza rakho , Qur'an padho .... All very good :-)
Ibadat is for self purification and Ramzaan is specially a time for introspection , when one controls hunger and thirst  as an offering of one's love to God Almighty and also as a means to enhance the compassion in one's heart for those who have to go without food (and at so many places even water is in limited supply ....or is even sold for cash/kind to the poor)
Ramzaan is also a time to think of such underprivileged people who go hungry not because they are fasting but because they don't have enough food

Also to perform any kind of  Ibadat / Prayer / Pooja one must be healthy and medically fit ...It should be an act of goodwill which must essentially result in peace and betterment of self and others....and not a burdensome complusion
Remember God does not have a favourite worship style and there could be infinite number of ways through  which one can pray and express one's gratitude and love for the Almighty 

As we welcome yet another month of Ramzaan , let us be thankful for the blessings we have and spend time in releasing the toxins from our thought process , relaxing our hearts and renewing ourselves into better human beings :-)

Ramzaan Mubarak to all

The "Guide"

Film "Guide" completed fifty years of its release in 2015.
An unrivalled, ahead-of-its-time film, "Guide", as we all know was based on a novel of the same name by reputed writer R K Narayan, directed by the legendary Vijay Anand and produced by Dev Anand.
Vijay Anand has also contributed to the screenplay of "Guide".
There was also a 120-minute US version written by Pearl S Buck which was produced and directed by Tad Danielewski.
"Guide" was screened at the 2007 Cannes Film Festival, all of forty two years after its release.

From the conviction and faith the producer-director team had in the story to Waheeda Rahman accepting to play the female lead, "Guide" has been a very unique and special experience.
Special not only for the makers, but for the fans and viewers as well.

It is not just another film.
It is an experience that leaves the audience enriched, pensive and entertained.
The songs of "Guide" have been among the best in Bollywood history, remain unsurpassed in flavour and popularity even after half a century.
The music (by none other than Sachin Dev Durman), the lyrics (by legendary poet philosopher Shailendra), ... and their presentation ... superlatively class apart ... !!!
And totally wowsome are Waheeda Rahman's dances, not to forget her amazingly accomplished portrayal of Rosie!!!

An interesting memory associated with one of the songs of "Guide" was narrated by Pandit Shiv Kumar Sharma.
He said in one of his television interviews that Pancham Da being a good friend of his coerced him into playing the tabla for the song "Mo se chhal kiye jaaye ... " although Pandit Ji had left playing tabla and was concentrating on Santoor.

I have heard Waheeda ji saying Dev Saheb was so comfortable and secure in his performance that not once did he try to even remotely overshadow her in the film.

I saw "Guide" after more than a decade of it's release.
In those days the sprawling lawns of our Colony Club used to fill up with the residents every Saturday night.
The weekly film show used to be a much awaited event for most of the people.
And of course "Guide" was House(Lawn)Full !!!

A family friend who was staying about thirty kilometers away, had seen the film nine times already came over all the way specially to see it yet another time.
I am convinced that in doing so he was not exaggerating his reverence for "Guide".
He was doing exactly what I have been doing ever since.

I see a new Dev Anand every time I watch him in "Guide" 

I learn something new ... something good ... and I cry every time Dev Saheb sings "Din Dhal jaaye ... " , Kya se Kya ho gayaa ...." , and watching that dialogue with the antaraatmaaa ... 

 · 
"Guide" is an overwhelming and unparalled phenomenon.
From the beginning "Guide" was special.
Everything about it was so different from the films we were used to seeing in those days ....
It was a deeply engrossing saga of complicated human relationships woven with incredible sensitivity and ease.
Who can forget the philosophy of "Wahaan kaun hai tera .... "
The grandeur of "Piya to se naina laagey re ... "
The pathos of "Din dhal jaaye ... "

An ardent fan of "Guide" has mentioned this following small bit of interesting information on Facebook, and I am copy-pasting it here :

The conversation between a lesser known actor Dilip Dutt (a regular in B R Ishara films) and Dev Saheb is memorable and remains heart touchingly profound even to this day :
Dilip Dutt : "'kya baat hein Sir aaj akele hee pii rahein hein "
Dev Anand : "'Batein karne ko itna taras raha thaa Mani kee socha thodi pii kar apne aap se kuchh kahooNga "

Aur ...Mani ki chaal ... that small shot from behind ... when he leaves ... 
ek taraf ye aur doosri taraf puri picture "Guide". Am exagerating,? 
But not as much as I appear to ... " !!!

And another fan readily agrees , adding:
"Yes ... also captivating is the moment when he keeps the unfinished Glass on the table and looks upwards where he can see Waheeda ji ...
Thanks to Vijay Anand, Dilip Datt would be remembered in History "

And Dev Anand, the gentleman that he was, saw to it that even the smallest actor would not be ignored.
Such is the undying, unfading magic of  "Guide" that everything about it touches the soul.
Everyone knows they are watching a film.
But what a deeply moving, spiritually enriching and genuinely soul-stirring experience it is to watch Dev Saheb absorbing in himself the ultimate enlightenment!!!
The unadulterated bliss of it all was so real and so comforting, its aura engulfing and hypnotizing the audience completely ....

That was the kind of honesty with which The Great Anand Brothers created this legend on screen ... A stunning tale of Real Eternal Beauty !!!

When the film ended I knew once was not enough ...
Must have seen it countless times after that, but every time there is something enriching and refreshing to discover ... to learn ... to relive ...
The "Guide" never ceases to guide.

They say you live only once. But if you can do it right, once is enough.
With one matchless masterpiece, Dev Anand has ensured that he would be remembered for many many more decades not only as a heart warming romantic hero, but as an intense and compellingly magnificent actor film maker too !!!
He is ageless and timeless.
With "Guide", he attained immortality.

Dear Maggie

Every love affair begins at some point in time , knowingly or unknowingly ... Often the most " durable , sturdy and long-lasting " are  those that grow and mature with time .... not meaning to offend the love-at-first-sight fans a la Karan Johar and Aditya Chopra brands ;-)  :-)

I don't remember precisely when Maggie was launched in India , but what I precisely remember is the morning she entered my life :-)
She looked inviting , tempting and so beautiful as she  outshone everything else on the  breakfast table that day at my sister-in-law's place in Allahabad  .... In fact I don't even remember what else was there !!!

I had been just about married . That first  winter in Allahabad was a beautiful and luxuriant experience when I was introduced to a life completely different from what I had been living till then.
Civil Lines in Allahabad in contrast to the much calmer Bombay of those days  used to still be lovelier and beautiful  any time of the year  ... I can never forget the gorgeous , stately spacious bungalows , sprawling lawns and abundant flower beds (specially in winters) .... and the plentiful gulmohars and amaltash blossoms of the summers.

An aura so romantic sows seeds of long lasting , affectionate and strong  associations as happened with Maggie and my family :-)
She gradually crept into our lives and made for herself a permanent place
The children turned out to be even greater admirers , insisting to take her to school with them , much to dismay and disagreement of my health-conscious-traditionally-indoctrinated mother-in-law :-)
But we had to give in to the pleasures of the younger generation once in a while , hence the children were allowed to take her to school on special occassions  ;-) :-P

It is not just the children , even we the elders and  so many lakhs like us have found her to be that Mom-like-well wisher who would never let us sleep hungry ....
We will always love her ... And why NOT ?

I have one last ( out of an economy pack of four ) Maggie atta noodles portion left in my kitchen ....
But after the latest developments I ve been postponing eating it ....

Jaaney phir kab miley type of emotions ....  :-)

Times change ....and how... ???
In my childhood Maggie used to be a woman ( and also featured in a  very endearing cartoon strip of those days ) , then she became a delicious noodle brand  , and now very sorry to hear that she has become something like  an abuse...

But  even when there is such a strong current flowing against Dear Maggie , those holier than thou clan of "Haaaaaaawwwwwwwww-you ve-eaten-Maggie-all-these-years" somehow come across as among the most ungrateful people around ....

Miyan , My Nana

It comes to you in scattered memories.
Like bits and fragments of a corroding mosaic pattern.
I am talking of an entire era gone by.

Interestingly those childhood memories sometimes peep through the clouds of time in a casual conversation with one's own children
But most vibrantly they pour in when you are in the company of your school friends, cousins and siblings. Each one has shared a patch of their life with you. And together for each one the experience of going over that shared past brings a sense of enriched fulfillment

Radiant with golden rays of the setting sun at a point far away in the horizon, and promising to rise with renewed sparkle and vigour ushering in a new dawn ...
The past and the future thus meet in the present moment !

The vastly spread out palatial kothi with its arched gates and long baradariis, high ceilings, huge rooms ... intricate mosaic floors and walls ... still stands.
Many years ago the towering wooden gate would open in the morning and an uninterrupted flow of men and women would start soon after breakfast time.

Miyan ( My Nanaa ) would sit on a comfortable chair with long arm rests from morning till afternoon listening to people who would come to meet him on issues ranging from legal and political to personal and family.
Everyone who would be there at lunch time was inevitably his guest and would join him in the dining room at the oval dining table ...

We as children were always in awe of him and hence whatever I know about him is through Mummy telling us about the kind of person he was and the values he held close to his heart ...

I don't remember having any conversation with him .... We used to use the private side entrance so as to not disturb Miyan in his meeting, to go upstairs to where Ammi Jaan (My Naani ) would be busy  preparing paan-giloris for the people sitting with Miyan downstairs, or cleaning some part of the house with her marked thoroughness, or some such other activity ...
Miyan was more  a man of the people and for the people, greatly loved and respected through the town ...

Miyan would retire to his room after lunch for a siesta.
Early in the evening he would go to the family mango orchard adjacent to the Kothi, which also had a small graveyard, the resting place of family elders who were no more ...
Miyan would sit there reciting The Holy Qur'aN for some time

He was very fond of gardening.
He loved planting all sorts of trees and looked after them like an affectionate father taking care for his children.
Some of the trees planted in his time still stand like silent onlookers as Time passes through their branches and leaves.

Miyan was deeply religious, but not a fanatic or extremist ...
During Holi and Diwaali when people from the neighbourhood visited him he took their greetings  with great respect and affection

Also Mummy told us a small story to illustrate how sane and logical he was
One evening, when the town and its outskirts were experiencing a a communally charged atmosphere, Miyan had just finished the asar-ki-namaaz, his personal attendant came in to inform that there is a group of people outside who wish to meet him urgently.

They were the residents of a nearby village.
They spilled out their fear nervously.
They had heard that a mob was planning to desecrate a Masjid in their village in the darkness of the  night
Naturally they wanted Miyan to do something to stop it.
At least talk to the authorities and get police force out in the village for protection of the Muslim place of worship
Miyan's response must certainly have stunned them for he said :
"Look I believe that Masjid is a house of God / Allah / Khuda ... and  He is responsible for the protection of His House ... We need not interfere, He will do His best"
Perhaps he knew that if at all there was any truth in the rumour the presence of police without nay untowrd happening could serve the mischief mongers' purpose.

Miyan was opposed to Indian Muslims leaving India during the most scarring and nerve-shattering national tragedy called The Partition of India.
He would counsel the victims of violence, often providing financial assistance too to those who had lost their belongings, urging them to not leave their place of birth.
I am reminded of him very intensely every time I see Balraj Sahni in "Garam Hawa"

He was a great champion of education and women's emancipation
In matters of marriage also girls in the family had the liberty to choose and voice their dissent if they did not agree on certain things
Also noteworthy is another fact that even in those traditionally orthodox times purdah was never forced upon the women in the family.

These are just a few glimpses from a life lived simply and for the larger benefits of the common man rather than selfish materialistic gratification.
Miyan did not preach with words
His actions and life style were his teaching to those who came in contact with him.
He was Simple, philanthropic, secular, broad minded, logical, patriotic, respectful, with a warm sense of humour.
I am overwhelmed, but not surprised, to know how immensely he is respected even today not just by those have seen him, but also by those who have only heard of him through their parents and grand parents

These are the kind of Stories from the past that we must pass on to our children .
We really don't need to remember which king killed whom and in which battle or which of the battles were holy.
Anything that results in killing and bloodshed cannot be justified how much ever religious scholars try.
In fact violence finding religious sanction is certainly and most horrifically man-made.
It serves political agendas and desecrates religion.

Stories of pseudo valiance carried forward from generation to generation have done humanity no good.
One such, and perhaps the most recent in our History is that of the Partition of India.
It has since been used to generate and ignite self defeating emotions of Hurt and guilt, victim-hood and self pity and doubt and suspicion

There is now an urgent need to dig out positive stories from the past and share them widely
Tales of love and compassion may help people to think better, feel better ....and do better ....

People like MiyaN were blessed.
Even their memories help to light up dark moment with hope for a better future, making the connection with one's past a pleasant experience.
The chain from past to present to future must be one that adorns us with positive energy instead of being a chain that strangulates liberty.

Happy Anniv Abbi Mummy

Nostalgiaaaaa ....
Was looking in to the things Mummy has left behind ....
Her purses , clothes , books ...
And in one of her purses I found something that has touched me to tears ...
An ordinary piece of paper on which I had written these lines for her ... Lines that I had read somewhere on Facebook

She loved poetry and most often when I found something nice I used to share with her ...

She had loved this piece ...

So I wrote it on a piece of paper and gave it to her ....
" Aankhon se ojhal huay dil se bhi door ho gaye
Kitney pakkey thay wo rishtey jo yuun choor ho gaye

Maili-maili si wo yaadein meri aankhon ne unhein dho dalaa
Khil uthi khwahishon ki dhanak , sajda e dil manzoor ho gaye

Ab nayi mehfilein hain naye log naye rishtey hain
Zindgi mein roshni hain nayi, raastey puurnoor ho gaye

Maazi ki umass mein jiye jaatey thay khud apne hi dushman bann kar
Khol kar dil ke kiwaadon ko jo dekhaa hai to masroor ho gaye

Door thay khud se , to bhooley huay thay andaaz e safar e ziist
Dil ki dhadkan ne jagaayaa to khwaabon ke shaher zinda e tabeer ho gaye "

I love reading and I love poetry .... Heirlooms from Mummy's treasure chest ... !!!
Earlier family and friends would tell me that I'm a true replica of my father ...
And now some of my friends say I have started resembling my mother too ... !!!
What a humbling feeling it is to realize that your parents are living in this world through you

Kuchh cheezein to dikhaai bhi nahi deti haiN .... lekin khoob sunaai deti haiN ... I can still hear Mummy's khanakti hui subah subah ki Good Morning as I often feel her standing behind me or at the door to my room , when I used to be sitting at my table and she would come to say " I am going to sleep now " ... 
And the way she used to say " Hello .... I'm FINE " on the phone ... !!!

And my father's hearty laugh vibrating like a positive synergy in all corners of the house filling every corner with renewed vigour ...
His ever smiling face ... So serenely affectionate

My parents' exemplary selflessness , truthfulness , honesty, simplicity and innocence till the last  breath in this world ... Such rare and priceless treasure
Kuchh nahi khoya hai ...
Sab yaad hai ...

Our parents are never really away from our hearts ... But till the time they are around and with us we never really stop being a child ... Lekin ... when they leave , one suddenly grows up ... It is a life changing experience ...

28th Feb was my parents wedding anniversary ... This year they are celebrating it in The Heaven above ...

My First Love

It took me an aeon to actually realise that falling in love  comes naturally , easily .... and quite unknowingly too... :-) :-)
All these years  I cursed the Hindi Films for creating what I thought was an unnecessary hype about " First Love " because how much ever I thought of it , I could not remember the boy/man who was my so called First Love :-)

Yeah ! Yeah ! Memory takes a dip for the worse when one is getting old .... Lekin phir bhi .... If First Love was anything so exceedingly important , then  no matter how many dips the memory takes , or even if it freezes , that precious image had to remain forever intact and eternally exciting.
Not only this , there had to be and "in-built instant recall system" in the brain (or may be the heart in such cases ;-) ) to fetch it back at one's will and desire.
Strangely there seemed none in my case ....
Okay so this proves I was different .... Perhaps I just wasted my delightfully naughty teenage only to get tied up with the responsibilities of  a  married life some years  later :-)
Honestly this sounded a little boring and I sympathised fully with myself on having lost such priceless moments doing nothing !!!

But one fine evening as I sat with my cup of tea listening to an old song of Rafi-Dev Anand combo the memories of my First Love flashed like a rejuvenating sparkle , lighting up the evening with a glow that was both enriching and splendorous  ....
Never for a day was it away from my heart ...
Yeah ! Never away because it was not a memory .
It was a part of my own self ...and  as I grew up and matured , so did the magic of my first love ...its aura engulfed me so affectionately that I feel incomplete without those moments of euphoric joyousness and quiet contentment ....
Those were moments so gloriously colourful .... So divinely soothing .... So eternally stunning !!!

What was my age then ?
A tender thirteen or fourteen I think .
Father was posted at a place which was filled to the brim  with abundant  natural beauty ... And children were not over protected out there  for the simple reason that the place was perfectly safe .
The bungalow we lived in was almost on the edge of a valley ... And about a quarter kilometer away was this place that I would often go to all by myself.

Oh! How immensely I missed  that priceless phase in life  and longed to experience it all over once again right there ....at that very moment with the cup of tea in my hands and the song playing in the background ... :-)

The place where I used to sit evening after evening was a rock on the edge of the mountain . Far Far down below , in the valley there was a small village.
The huts in the village spread out vast and wide covering a large part of the valley . Evening was the time when , as the sun prepared to give us a cool and cozy break,  smoke could often be seen coming from the huts . A sign of  contentment that the families were preparing  a meal and would go to bed with their stomachs full ...
And across the valley rose the mountain range once again .... Behind which the sun had its retiring chamber :-)
I would forget the world around me and stare completely mesmerised by the magic unfolding right before my eyes as the sky changed colours from golden , to bright orange , from bright orange to dark ....and from dark oragne to a poetic mix of orange and grey ....
Why must all this happen so quickly ?
Why could Time not stand still in those divine moments when God  turned painter ?
Why must all that wealth of gold be lost in the darkness within such a short time ....

Oh! How passionately and wholeheartedly  I desire to hold those moments in my arms and sit with them forever !!!
That one picture of  "The Setting Sun" which I used to see almost every evening keeps coming back to me every day even now ...
That glorious sight was created by the Almighty right before me ....and solely for my eyes !!!
What a Heavenly  treat it was .... !!!
Even now I can feel its magic within me ....it gives me goose bumps whenever I think of it ....it makes me smile ...and it makes me happy
That sheer magnificence sure was ,   still is and will always remain my First Love ...
 

Words undress you

Ever thought about the power of  spoken / written words ?

What you speak and  how you speak gives away your most secret inner self .
Just like friends do.
Remember "A man is known by the company he keeps "

Body language has become an important tool in making personality assessment these days. The language of silence may also be included as an extension one's body language .
But still one cannot deny or even ignore the message conveyed through spoken words.
Body language and  the language of silence is pretty much guess work . Keen and intelligent observers do study gestures and  facial expressions with great attention, and then give their interpretations
But  after a thorough critical analysis what they conclude is  at the end of the day their personal perception .

I read  a lot of Urdu and Hindi poetry  and remember reading this very profound couplet a little while ago :
"(Lafz) kehney waalon ka kuchh nahi jataa
(Lafz ) seh-ney waaley kamaal kartey hain "

Another one that is again unforgettable is:
"Wo ek baat bahot talkh kahi thi uss ne
Baat to yaad nahi yaad hai lehja uss ka"

It is said that one must never speak when angry or tense , the logic being a mind preoccupied with anger and tension is usually not in the right state of taking decisions and judging situations sensibly., which is obvious .
This advice is for the speaker of course.
But the listener is advised to pay attention to people when they speak in anger because it is said that like a drunkard who does not know what he is doing , an angry person usually  pours out his/her heart's inner most emotions in that state of mind , and hence he talks without any mask or pretense , therefore one can conclude that in a fit of anger one usually lashes out all the emotions that they may have kept subdued for better reasons.

Written words become even more authentic expressions of one's mind and heart . It is said that words once spoken cannot be taken back , but they may be forgotten or at times misunderstood too , however the written word is an undisputed  proof of one's thought process.

These days we are seeing large scale degradation in the values and morals including the language that is being used all around , and knowingly or unknowing being encouraged by various kinds of media. 

Obscenity and rudeness seems to be gaining acceptance even in educated and seemingly cultured homes . Civility , respect and decency are becoming extinct in the present social set up .

It is therefore worthwhile to recall that sensuousness of the body and language is not enhanced by nudity or crassness . In fact whoever advised to "never under estimate the seductive power of a decent vocabulary" could not have said it more wisely and correctly.

In the conclusive analysis of behaviour  itt all come down to how someone made you feel through their word , action and attitude and since one's language plays an important part in what  people feel about you  , it is always better to choose your words CAREFULLY ,  RESPECTFULLY and with a HUMANE heart .